May 07, 2005

Woman Finds Penis In Vagina.

Ethel Hordavo,69, of Skagnut Park, OH, awoke with a fright yesterday morning. Feeling something strange against her inner thighs, she pulled the covers back to reveal a penis protruding from her vagina. "I was horrified!", she said. "I mean, I know damn well that wasn't there when I went to bed last night!" The penis, which is white, about 8 inches long and uncut, seems to have been cauterized. How it got where it did is anybody's guess. "After about 15 minutes, I immediately pulled it from my body and threw it against the wall. Disgusted and exhausted, I called the local police." Skagnut police arrived on the scene to find Ms. Hordavo in tears, smoking a Camel non-filter. "When she told us what she found, we were in total disbelief!", said police officer Dan Willkum. " I mean, stuff like this doesn't happen in Skagnut Park. Well, not very often, anyways." There hasn't appeared to have been any forced entry, except for the penis in the vagina, so all signs seem to point to an inside job. The penis has been taken into custody for a DNA match. Ms. Hordavo hopes that the police can solve this bizzare mystery so she can not have to worry about where the next penis may come from.

9 comments:

menopsycho said...

Things like that just don't happen here in Texas! Which is why I am moving to Ohio!

Abby Taylor said...

You are deeply disturbed. Which, coincidently, is why I like you.

Janet said...

Leave it to you.......... amazing!

Gadfly said...

Hey, that's some strange stuff. Which is exactly why I like it!

GPV said...

OK, A penis for your thoughts.

Anonymous said...

IT WAS MINE MUAHAHAHAHA

Luke said...

No ya fool, dat penis thing was mine and i want it back... I can proof it is mine because someone left me a smaller one and i dont like it...

Anonymous said...

lol only after 15 minutes eh? what was she doing with it?

Anonymous said...

If I was u I would have pulled it out and sucked it or done myself with it duhhhhh